I’m going to drop the typical modicum of professionalism I try and bring to this website for a minute.
Mock drafts dominate the NFL content space for most of the weeks between the Super Bowl and the draft. Some are going to be accurate. Some aren’t. Some are done to throw out different ideas on team building, or with various trades in mind. They all hold their place in the pre-draft content ecosystem.
With the 49ers not picking until No. 99 late in the third round, the ability to hammer out different mock drafts hasn’t been as easy. Instead for people writing about the 49ers the pre-draft stuff has involved diving deep on the draft class and trying to assess what players will be available, and which ones actually fit.
Instead of doing another seven-round mock, I wanted to do a regular mock with a pick for each team. Only, my goal isn’t to be right. Frankly, I’m not plugged in at all with other teams so any mock I tried earnestly to lay out was going to involve a lot of pulling from people who are plugged in. My goal was fun (what a concept!). So, with that in mind, here is an intensely unserious, wholly inaccurate mock draft featuring the first pick for every NFL team: