A rotation of Verlander…and Sandoval?

An excuse to honor a Giant great, and razz a guy just passing through on his way to Cooperstown

Buster Posey couldn’t be a troll, could he? Too clean-cut, too honest…right? But when you sign a 42-year old, guaranteed Hall of Famer in the throes of his cacophonous death rattles, there’s already a ruffled air of satire about. A fan has got to wonder, because frankly shenanigans should be afoot.

I mean, look at this deal: There’s no real expectation here with Justin Verlander other than to tally up another clip in a career highlight reel with a player wearing a Giants uniform, like Randy Johnson bagging his 300th win with San Francisco rather randomly reaching across his chest. 300 wins is out of reach, but it’s quite possible Verlander will strikeout his 3,500th career batter in the orange-and-black. He could surpass Walter Johnson for ninth on the all-time list soon after, which will probably come on an elevated fastball to Freddie Freeman. Signing an old fart for one last trip around the merry-go-round is more marketing play than roster move. Verlander won’t be a Giant, not a real one, because he’s already an institution to himself. He’s an LLC, for tax purposes; or an endowed chair, a pitcher-in-residence hired by the Major League Baseball corporation to putz around in arbitrary jerseys and break records.

So if Verlander’s tenure as a Giant is to be a mostly ceremonial affair, there better be some funny business planned to help us get through it.

Imagine: Grand POBO Posey as the ultimate prankster at the helm of a prank a decade-plus in the making. A jocular jab in the ribs from one old ball dude to another. Besides, is not Posey contractually obligated as now franchise-face to splash about in the warm baths of nostalgia every chance he can? The signing of Verlander is in the same vein as Posey’s own hire… There’s no present like the past — and the gift that keeps on giving is the gif of Verlander in his prime reckoning with the weight of reality, succumbing to its awe, after Pablo Sandoval flipped his second baseball of the day into the bleachers at AT&T Park.

Will Verlander ever live down the Sandoval onslaught in game one of the 2012 World Series? A better question: Should he be allowed to?

Verlander is entering his 20th season of a career certain of enshrinement and intends to fart around until he’s 45, pocketing multi-million, single year deals until then…because he can. The answer to the previous question is heck no! The guy has got it made in the shade. Meanwhile the 38 year old Sandoval hasn’t played in the Majors since 2021, but has pocketed his glove, thrown his bat over his shoulder and traversed the globe, sweating out play in Venezuela, Mexico, the UAE, the Giants camp in Arizona, then Staten Island, refusing to leave the diamond.

Pablo is the love of the game embodied. Verlander is the paunch. So why not have some fun? In the collective psyche of a Giants fan, where Verlander is, Pablo is also, ready to jump on an 0-2 elevated fastball, or ambush a 2-0 outside heater. The two are inextricably linked thanks to that fateful October day, so let’s make that truth a physical reality.

Staten Island (where Sandoval played last season as a member of the Staten Island FerryHawks) geographically, isn’t particularly close to Oracle. Spiritually, it’s as far removed as the saved are from the damned. But if Verlander is to take the mound in San Francisco it feels like Posey’s moral obligation to have Pablo there also — and not behind him in the infield, or supporting him as a bench bat, or even as a backstop calling pitches (though that should happen too), but as a fellow member of the same pitching staff.

It’s a stupid idea — but it’s not completely stupid, and not completely stupid ideas can sometimes waver and tip and morph into something, dare-I-say… brilliant? Sandoval had two appearances as a pitcher in his Giants career, single outings in 2018 and 2019 that will go down in history…quite literally. Sandoval was Babe Ruth before Shohei, and was Shohei before Shohei. In 2019 against the Reds, Pablo became one of the only MLB players in history to hit a homer, steal a base, record a putout at a defensive position other than pitcher, and pitch in the same game. Funnily enough, center fielder Roman Quinn achieved the same amazing, and specific, feat three months later for the Phillies.

We’re still waiting for Shohei to pull that one off…

No hits, no runs, no base on balls — a pretty flawless pitching rap sheet for the Panda. The only base runner he allowed came by way of a hit-by-pitch: one José Peraza who was promptly erased on a 6-4-3 double play ball two batters later. Over his two career innings, Pablo faced the minimum. A four year hiatus didn’t phase him either. As a FerryHawk this past season, Sandoval made three more appearances on the mound including one start with 7.1 innings logged. His career ERA is still 0.00.

My official proposal, finally: Buster Posey signs Sandoval to a discrete, one-day contract. (Shhhhh…don’t tell Verlander). Have Pablo’s arrival correspond with some obscure anniversary of his World Series fireworks display. How about…April 24th against Milwaukee — the 150th month celebration of the day Sandoval knocked Verlander on his heels.

Obviously, Bob Melvin has set it up to have Verlander scheduled to pitch that game. They roll the ol’ geyser out there, let him go about his routine, nothing amiss. But when it’s time to pull him (actually a little before then, because this needs to happen mid-inning), instead of Melvin trotting out to conduct the pitching change, send Sandoval. The crowd erupts. Even after all these years, the Panda is instantly recognizable, the number 48 proud and bold on his back as he trots out to the mound, and like he did 150 months prior, Sandoval sticks a fork in Verlander, telling him he’s done. Then, of course, instead of signaling for a reliever from the bullpen, Sandoval pulls his mitt from his back pocket and takes the ball himself, because in that situation, there’s really only one arm we can trust to finish the inning.